Revelations Of A Too Busy Mom

Last night, I was cooking dinner for the family and the dog wanted to eat, I had just taken the previously frozen chili out of the microwave and sat it on the counter while Dumbass bounced around waiting for his meal. I was carefully mixing together his dog food, a delectable combination of wet and dry food, when a small hunk of wet dog food flew off the spoon. You know where it landed, don’t you? You guessed it; it landed right into the chili. I stood staring at it in horror, quietly cursing myself and my very existence on the planet, when the phone rang. Brother-in-law was calling asking if he could come by for dinner, if it wasn’t too much trouble. I grabbed a clean spoon and stared at the noticeable dog food in the chili when the doorbell rang and Fredo knowing it was his Uncle ran to answer it, before I could successfully fish it out, Brother-in-law was standing in the kitchen next to me asking what was for dinner.

What did I do?

I quickly mixed the very small dollop of dog food into the chili, and prayed no one would notice as I told him they were having Chili Dogs for dinner. Everyone raved about how great dinner was; guess I should mix a little dog food in with chili more often.

Washington Does More Dumbshit Things During Election Years

Senior Citizens are about to lose their Medicare benefits and most don’t know exactly how to sign up for the new benefit. Our Fearless leader says that deadlines are important in ABC News’ hot button story (that and Britney Spears is pregnant—isn’t that a load off your mind). How about a deadline for Iraq? How about even a ballpark idea? How about a real deadline for Illegal Immigration? How about a deadline of sorts to the end of high fuel prices? Yes, deadlines are important, I wish someone would explain that to our fearless leader.

Does This Man Have No Shame?

I’m on a Tom Cruise rant again since People Magazine online reports that stupid fuckwit told Good Housekeeping magazine that his 13-year-old daughter told him, “Don’t let this one go. She’s the one.” Ohmyfuckingod! How incredibly self-absorbed can you get? Firstly what the fuck does a 13-year-old know about the complexities of relationships? I don’t care what that stupid Scientologist fuckwit says to try to redeem his apparently faltering public image, getting using his child to show such disrespect to her own mother is just despicable. Haven’t we had enough of him yet? Honestly, he should go live with Michael Jackson. I used to just think he was a shitty actor, period, but now I realize hopefully along with everyone else with half a brain that he’s a shitty person too.

Finally A Word Or Two About Donald Duck and/or Avian Flu

I watched a small snippet of the Bird Flu (formally known here as Donald Duck is evil) movie and hate to admit I laughed my ass off. Instead of using bird flu, small pox would have been more likely to cause all that. Considering in the last two major pandemics most people didn’t know it was going on, except a few more people got sick than normal.

Some semi alarmists in other blogs are asking if you’re prepared for such an event. I ask who the hell has room to store six months worth of everything you would need to survive such a thing? Who knew Donald Duck could be such a threat? What the hell, it is the May sweeps now isn’t it? Funny but ABC first aired the movie The Day After during sweeps and it generated just as much attention. Guess I’ll have to check with my Bible Banging friend to see what Pat Robertson thinks about all this, in fact, I’m willing to bet he’s “encouraging” his views to use those gas masks and generators he encouraged them to buy during Y2K to make use of them.

I just saw a commercial on TV claiming Bird Flu is already here…and they’re selling masks through their website…OMGFUCKINGOD!!!!!!!!!!!!! I won’t even repeat the website because I don’t think they deserve any more hits, besides that commercial spoke volumes.

Wonders Never Cease

How I managed to work into my blog, chili tainted with dog food, Couch Jumper, The Pop Dipshit, the Freaky Manchild, Donald Duck, Our Fearless Leader, and Old Jackass all in one post. Fuck! I’m exhausted now.

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