The First Week
Yes, school is out for summer here and already the kids are nearly bored. I only say nearly because of the afore posted about Wii seems to be holding their interest, maybe a little too well. Its not that they've been playing it whole lot, only in the evenings because there is NOTHING on TV right now and I don't care if they play. So far the kids are engrossed in the Paper Mario Game, so life is good at least for them. It's keeping them occupied effectively enough that they are staying out of my hair and behaving themselves. I'd say it's been a life saver.
My house however, is suffering the effects of having crap everywhere, and today, I even found a pair of my older kid's blue jeans in the kitchen!
In any event, we're on vacation all this week
in fact today we're heading out to see the famed Spruce Goose (yes in all the years I lived in California, I never saw it there). So I'll be back in all my glory next week, with a complete update on everything we did, including my horrible (absolutely horrible) miniature golf score.
Until then…Ciao
Sorry, but I Must Brag
My older son had his 6th grade promotion today. This morning he was freaking out because he couldn't find his "speech" he was supposed to give. He said he thought it was in his backpack but he couldn't find it...he was freaked out (he NEVER once despite me asking repeatedly told me what was going on during the promotion thing). I was annoyed when I put him and his little brother on the bus.
8:30 AM husband and I meet at the school and we were both seriously overdressed, most people looked like they just rolled out of bed. Husband's wearing his power suit and I'm dressed nicely as well (we can't have him looking good and me looking like crappo, can we?).
So we find seats near the back, the place was packed with parents. A few band members performed, then the principal spoke...boring....snooze.
Then each child got up (in alphabetical order no less) and said something about their time in the school. OMG half the kids couldn't string a sentence together..lots of "umms" "ands" "you knows" and "like". One or two were good, and rather engaging. Naturally, Older Son was one of the last kids to speak (we're at the tail end of the alphabet; I was seriously mentally cussing husband out) and I wasn't surprised when he walked up, shook his teacher's and took the microphone without presenting any notes.
I'm not saying this because I'm his mom, but he sucked the oxygen out of the room! He was completely engaging when after introducing himself, he opened with a short talk about his first teacher (whom we both HATED) at the school, "A lot of the kids didn't like Mrs So-and-so because she was too strict and yelled a lot (lots of laughter--she's no longer teaching at the school), but if you want a nice teacher you have to a nice person to them."
Every ONE in the room said "Awww" and a one teacher who is retiring this year started to cry.
Then he went on to talk briefly about his teacher last year (whom we both liked a lot) and complimented him on his teaching skills and the fact he took the time to play basketball in the classroom with the kids, "How cool is that?" he asked the audience who laughed again. He Spoke glowingly about his current, who is well traveled and said, "She would bring trinkets and pictures of her travels and it was like looking at a geography book and made the learning more enjoyable." Then he echoed what his teacher said said in her short speech earlier to the kids, "...life is not about the destination, it's about the journey...and she's lived that."
Finally, he wrapped it up by talking about how bittersweet it is to be leaving the school, how glad he was that today was the last day of school, and there would be no homework, (big laughs) but also sad "because next year, although I'm prepared for the challenges of middle school, I won't be returning here except to visit." Then he thanked the audience and departed.
The applause was for him thunderous. Some parents seated behind us and standing, mused about what a good speech it was. I actually felt bad for the last kid who followed him--I haven't a clue what he said. I was in shock.
After another short speech from the principal, everyone got up to leave. I'm not kidding you but we couldn't get to our son, so many parents and other staff were shaking his hand and complimenting him on his speech. It also helped people remember him because he was next to last.
Then when they realized we were with him, they shook our hands. Of course we gushed about how proud we were but honestly we were speechless...we sounded like two inarticulate boobs. We were so taken aback. Then I asked him if that was the speech he intended to give, and he said simply, "no, I winged it."
Is It Time Yet?
That's question I'm growing increasingly weary answering, well that and "how many more days?" as constantly queried by Fredo. As of tomorrow at 2:15 PM the boys will be free from the rigors of getting up early, having to worry about homework, and onto endless hours of TV watching and video game playing, especially for the older son. I know, he should be going outside and playing, getting dirty and exploring the world, but he's not that kind of kid and never has been.
Going To War
A few years ago, I mentioned to my husband that the older kid would like a Game Cube, and he instantly replied, "no, I don't think he needs one, he needs to be outside more." I reminded husband that the weather was inclement (we were living in the San Francisco Bay Area at the time) and who wants to play outside in that. What was the kid going to do, run outside at 5PM when the weather cleared and stay outside for an hour until the fog rolled back in? This was the same child that dressed himself in preppy shirts and simple black pants for school when the rest of his classmates were wearing shorts, and tank tops, in the 50-degree temperatures. He's the kind of kid that always has his jacket in case the weather turns poorly. He has about as much interest in sports as I do and is probably just as bad at them. He's never learned to ride a bike because he had no interest in riding one and prefers to take walks. Not to mention he throws a ball like a girl and is even worse at catching one. But most importantly, this kid of mine never asks for anything. I'm not kidding, I could take him to Toys R us, and tell him he could have anything in the store and he'd walk out with NOTHING! I know this because I've tried it several times. The only things the kid has ever asked for are the Game Cube, years later he asked for some Pyrates Mega Block sets, and games both video and board games, Nick magazine, special art paper to draw on, colored pencils, crayons and things related to drawing, and a large desk for his room. The kid is thirteen and over the course of his life these are few things he's ever wanted. Naturally, I hate refusing a request he has, so I went to war with husband to get the kid the game system he wanted. And eventually husband relented, and the kid practically crapped himself one Christmas when he saw the system—I think he was 9.
They are True Opposites
Conversely his younger brother loves being outdoors and even though he also doesn't throw so well, he's obviously better than his elder sibling. When we lived in California the kid was always tanned (yes, you can tan in fog), and I couldn't keep that kid inside the house or get him to watch TV if I paid him to unless it was raining hard outside, and even then he'd play under the covered porch. Just to be outdoors.
Ironically, everything he enjoys, like trying (and I do mean trying) to play basketball, or swinging on the swing set (a huge bonus when we moved to this house), husband refuses to make the back yard more kid friendly for him and daydreams of when the swing set finally falls apart so he can create some sort of garden retreat on that side of the yard.
Well, the swing set now is falling apart, and the side of the house is so overgrown with Himalayan blackberry, the underside of the deck is filled with husband's stuff, and the rest of yard is either has dog poop, or roses where Fredo knows not to play. So by default Husband has actually created a child that now prefers to be indoors because it's so less restrictive. Like his brother he does enjoy taking walks—in fact, he walk circles around all of us.
Varied Degrees of Winning
As I explained we did get the older son, a Game Cube, and he became rather addicted to it, when he started lying about not having any homework so he could play the games more, husband gave me a smug look. All the games were taken away until he was caught up and that lasted months from around March until June one year. That said, he learned from it, much to husband's chagrin, and has never had the problem since. He understands that things we do as a family come first, watching movies, playing board games, and going places. The video games are reserved for when there isn't anything else for him to do.
Now, I wasn't entirely surprised when one day while watching Star Trek: Voyager, he commented on a commercial, "Those Nintendo Wii systems look pretty cool, don't they mom?" I hadn't paid much attention to it before that but after knowing this kid as well as I do, I knew that was his way of saying he wanted one.
Speak Nicely and Make a Heavy Meal
So, I jotted down a few pluses for the Nintendo Wii, and planned to do a roast, garlic smashed potatoes and gravy topped with caramelized onions, and large Cesar salad (with real anchovies…yuck). I made my chocolate fudge brownies, topped with a layer of peanut butter, and then iced with chocolate frosting and opened a bottle of Zinfandel. I might have even lit candles, though I don't really recall now.
He came home to a stunningly clean house, the children quiet, and the scent of roast beef filling the air, I offered him a cocktail, gin and tonic, as he sat down. I didn't hand him the remote control, or offered to change to the channel on the TV because that would have seemed too obvious. After he finished the cocktail I set the table, and poured the wine, then called everyone to dinner, we talked about the day, and I didn't bring up the Wii. The timing had to be perfect.
After dinner, I cleaned the kitchen while he used the computer catching up on his avoided email, and then spending time working. I kept his wine glass filled. When the bottle was empty, it was time for the younger one to take his evening bath and then dessert. I glanced over my notes. Again, this was about timing.
After the kids went to bed, we settled down with the dog, on the sofa, and I sipped the only glass of wine I'd had that evening. 
I was nursing it, making it last until the commercial came on for the Wii. "Thank goodness, it's about time," I thought as I watched it, and then casually said to my husband, "you know, we should really think about that for Older Son. He mentioned it the other day, and it might be a good gift for him." I didn't make eye contact with husband, just continued with my plan, "You have to move your arms and such to make it work, but I think I heard that all the Game Cube Games will work with it (Of course I already knew damn well this was the case because I had researched it). He instantly replied that the answer was no. Unflinchingly, I continued, "he's worked so hard this year, and has done very well, next year he's going into middle school—it's just a shame since he never asks for much of anything." I had him and I knew it.
© 2007 Whimsical Ranter
All Rights Reserved
Not with a Bang but a Whimper
No, I'm not talking about Paris Hilton going back to jail but instead the Soprano's series finale. I imagine everyone has heard about what a disappointment it is and I'd like to thank those people for spoiling it for the rest of us that refuse to pay for HBO. Now I have to wait months for it to come out on DVD to add my voice to the chorus, but by that time, no one will care. I'm also confused about the Soprano's season 6 DVD which says it's 6 Part 1, yet I'm watching interviews with the cast saying it's season 7. So will the next DVD set be Season Six Part 2 Or Season 7? If it says season 7, then what about season 6 Part 2. Maybe that cast just doesn't know which season they are working on since they had to keep so quiet on the bad ending.
Can You Believe They're Appealing?
No, not Paris Hilton, but the prosecutors in Atlanta, GA say they're going to appeal the decision handed down by a judge today letting a 19 year old free after serving only 2 years of a 10 year sentence for child Molestation. Before you start saying right on, the guy was 17, and the girl was 15. I'm sorry but when I was in high school I dated guys that were 17 and I engaged in sexual activity with them. As if this wasn't bad enough the guy wasn't screwing the girl but going down on her. Yes! They were engaged in oral sex.
Had he just screwed her, he would have been charged with a misdemeanor but instead he was charged with FELONY molestation because he was engaged in oral, and she was 15. Remember he's only 2 years older than her and never been in trouble a day in his life. Can you imagine having to register for the rest of your life as a sex offender for going down on your girlfriend? The law in Georgia was even changed because of this case so it can't happen to another kid and YET the prosecution wants to appeal the judge's decision? This pisses me off even more than the Paris Hilton crap.
Sister Paris?
Yes, about Paris Hilton, who was heard screaming Mom, Mom, Mom, when they judge ordered her back to jail, finally got a responsible driver in the back of a LA county Sheriff, who took her back to jail, while she sobbed. Now, she's had an epiphany and vows to be a better person, and that her time in jail has changed her life. Wonder if she got a refund on all the party supplies that will have to wait until her real release? Wonder if she'll become a nun? Sister Paris? I think if you look closely her booking photo, there could be a halo.
What amazes me is that she cries for her mom and whole media who before was ready to hang her by her well-manicured rich thumbs, did a 180 by saying how unfair the judge was? What? She claimed she didn't know her license was suspended, she at first tried to get out of appearing all together at her sentencing and then showed up late so yeah, and had a big blah attitude as if saying, "this is so not hot." Finally lets all understand that under California state law, she faced up to 90 days in the clink and already got off easy with 45.
© 2007 Whimsical Ranter
All Rights Reserved
Did You Hear the World Wide Groan?
Widely reported yesterday, Paris Hilton's exodus from jail and just as widely, further reports that she must appear before the sentencing judge at 9 AM Pacific Ranter Time today. One can only hope that the judge has good sense that God gave a goose and will remand her back to Los Angeles County Jail to continue her jail time. It turns out the California State's attorney is more than a little peeved that she was released so quickly and why the Sheriff seemingly decided this single-handedly.
I don't completely agree with Al Sharpton's assertion made yesterday when he said, "I think that it's both another glaring display of how race and money seem to get different treatments. There seems to be a different criminal justice system for some than others," Sharpton said.
While I do agree there does seem to be two different systems of justice, one for the wealthy, and one for the rest of us poor slobs, I don't believe race is the issue, after all we can't forget OJ. Or the slap on the wrist other rap musicians have gotten when involved in serious crimes. And lets not forget the sports figures that beat their wives, participate in dog fighting, drunken driving and a host of other crimes.
How Much Justice Can You Afford?
Clearly it's about money and the level of fame that separates us from the elite that seem to get away with everything. Sports figures often get away with more than the average person would because of their importance to the team or game they participate in--not to mention the fans allow it, as though it's a 'boys will be boys' mentality. Even Mike Tyson got a rather slap on the wrist when he committed his crime that was supposed to keep him from ever boxing again. They let a convicted rapist and psychopath like Tyson box, yet Pete Rose is denied being part of the baseball hall of fame because he gambled? Does anyone else think this insane?
How is that we live in a society that thinks nothing of paying thousands of dollars of a picture of Nicole Richie eating a hamburger, yet doesn't care about illegal immigration? Everyone waits with bated breath to hear what Sean Penn will say about Iraq but they don’t listen to the people who might have valid opinion on it. They'll listen and cheer with a mob mentality when Rosie spews her hostile, antagonistic, ill-informed opinion of September 11, yet refuse to give equal time to people that know what the hell they are talking about. I'm sick of this! I'm mad as hell and not going to take it anymore.
Justice is supposed to the great equalizer, regardless of ability to pay, everyone is entitled to a defense. In theory everyone faces the same rules and requirements, yet for some reason those who have a truckload of cash seem to the rules are just suggestions for them to follow or not. 
Clubs should allow Lindsay Lohan into their establishments because she'll bring other famous people to their club and not famous people to gawk. Never mind she's not even 21 yet, the rule doesn't apply and everyone looks the other way, even when the pictures are plastered all over the tabloids of her partying with a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other (California has a strict no smoking policy in any public establishment). No one thinks to ask why. Yet in a regular bar, if someone underage is caught drinking alcohol, the bar faces steep fines and the underage drinker goes to jail. Lindsay Lohan doesn't go to jail; she goes to some holistic rehab. The same place that believes there is no alcohol addiction, and once she's cured, she'll be able to drink like a normal person. Right.
© 2007 Whimsical Ranter
All Rights Reserved
The Whine Heard Round the World
"I can't be here, I'm famous and I had PMS, then I got killer cramps," Paris Hilton exclaimed between sobs to her shrink as she scratched herself raw and mumbled incoherently about the damned spots. Yes, she's been released to mansion and must wear an ankle bracelet for the next 40 days. Isn't that terrible? Party at Paris'! BOYB. Members of the Press Welcomed!
I'm really beyond annoyed by this "mystery illness" that doesn't require hospitalization and yet does require immediate release from the LA County Jail to the comfort of her mansion. I suppose the next complaint will be that the ankle bracelet she's supposed to wear for the 40 days will amount to cruel and inhumane punishment because it causes chaffing.
The reality is EVERYONE in the LA County Jail will be released and sent home with ankle bracelets, in fact, and the jail closed. Oh that's not going to happen? Only the uber wealthy Paris gets to go home? No surprise there I guess though I can feel the tremors from defense attorneys with clients in the County Jail all filing papers that their client suffers from the same mystery illness.
It's amazing what whining, coupled with pseudo fame and a shit load of money will get you.
Yes, I want to be convicted of reckless driving, then have my license suspended, get caught later driving, complain that I didn't understand the rules and no one explained to me that meant I couldn't drive, and then get a slap-on-the-wrist sentence, and finally whine until they release me to comfort of my own mansion. Wait, I don't own a mansion and I wouldn't be arrested for reckless driving, and I certainly would understand what the words "suspended license" means—and most of all I lack the money and mansion--I know I already said that last bit about the mansion, but bears repeating. What a big fucking waste of the California tax payers money! Maybe everyone should be released and sent to Paris' mansion for "house arrest."
BE A FUCKING MAN
If the real reason that dumb bitch was released is because the sheriff couldn't handle the constant calls and paparazzi stalking the jail, and disruption to regular prisoners, then SAY THAT MOTHER FUCKER. Don't say that she's released for a mystery illness that NO ONE is going to fucking believe anyway! For that she'd better have the same highly contagious, drug resistant TB!
Waaaaa Waaaaa
Famous people shouldn't be given a walk that the rest of us would NEVER get and frankly I'm tired of the shit. I'm tired of hearing about how they're hiding in rehab for this or that, and then hear about the plans for the big birthday blowout at some super hot nightclub. Sorry if you're an alcoholic or addict days after you get out of rehab isn't the time to hit a club. I'm seriously missing the easy breezy 90's when all the stars were coming out of the closet and saying they were gay. Even if they changed their minds when the novelty ran out—somehow I found it easier to understand.
© 2007 Whimsical Ranter
All Rights Reserved
in fact today we're heading out to see the famed Spruce Goose (yes in all the years I lived in California, I never saw it there). So I'll be back in all my glory next week, with a complete update on everything we did, including my horrible (absolutely horrible) miniature golf score.
